I am Regina

I am Regina!
By Francine  Chenoweth Richardson

I am 13 years old. I saw him as a father. He clothed me, fed me, and schooled me. As my father, I did not hesitate to do what he asked me to do like an obedient child, except those nights when he would touch me inappropriately. I flinched when his large hands would cover my upper chest. I felt helpless as his dominating adult body overwhelmed my small child’s body-frame. I turned my face, cried and then played dead to stop the pain. He tells me to be “quiet like a good girl” and “this is our secret” ; “don’t tell no one” as I laid there in pain and feeling confused. I am 13. 

Should my father be doing this to me? 
Soon after my helpless body was touched and penetrated, I started to feel weak, tired and sick. I am 13. I went to school and fainted. I knew something was wrong with me but who do I tell when it seems like everyone is looking at me “funny.” I was told that I am pregnant?” pregnant”? what is that?

Quickly I was removed from my home in the city and taken back to the village. I am surrounded by family but I am scared. People are talking but I am scare. I keep my face down. 
Who can I trust? Do they know what happened?

As my belly slowly extrude from my little and weak body for nine months, I am petrified. ” They say I was “bad girl!”. I am beginning to think that I am. At night, I cry and feel anxious. I am afraid of how this thing is going to come out of me. I feel excruciating pain. It is almost like the pain I felt before on most nights but this is worse. My tiny body has to push out a baby. They tell me I had baby, I am still in pain. I am 13.

My body is not working like it used to; I am urinating and defecating uncontrollably as if my body can no longer take the pain. Will this pain ever go away? I am told not to talk like I was told before. I keep my face down.

I was betrayed. The big people failed me. He says he not know me, papa, it ‘s me! Who can I trust to protect me? Can I trust you? I keep my face down. 
I am 13 years old, I am Regina, I am your daughter and countless of girls that are sexually abused every day in Liberia.

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